What’s Next 2019…

Before I get too deep into this post, I just want to put it out there…this is my story and I am writing this to be open with you all and most importantly with myself. Everyone’s cancer story is different. Everyone’s body is different. I could be battling the same type of cancer as someone else, but we both could be on different paths. No matter what, we all have a story to tell, our story and it may be different. Regardless, in the cancer world…we can relate to each other on a different level than we can with anyone else.

With this post, it is really about my story and what will work for me!

Ever heard of HIPEC? What it actually stands for ⬇️:
Hyperthermic (or Heated) Intraoperative Peritoneal Chemotherapy

As of now, next month I will be going in for another surgery. A pretty intense and long surgery. The goal behind it, to get rid of the disease. The surgery will mostly be my surgeon cleaning out the cancer, but what is so great…remember there is very little disease. Not much cleaning! Following the clean out, my surgeon may go in with HIPEC to finish the job. Now, a lot can go into this surgery and everyone’s situation with this procedure can be different. So for now, I am getting the cancer cleaned out of me! The surgery will be about 8 hours and I could be in the hospital anywhere from 7-9 days with a long recovery time at home. And again, the goal is to eliminate the remaining cancer. Of course, the right ovary came up in this conversation. My surgeon wasn’t able to get the camera down to see it, but he strongly feels he will need to remove it. The question comes to mind…do I have a whole hysterectomy? Yes…

I have mentioned earlier on, my mom battled ovarian cancer. With that and everything else, the answer is yes. Along with having the HIPEC surgery, I will also have a hysterectomy. After being diagnosed, it makes you think…A LOT. When you get genetic testing done, it makes you think…A LOT. It makes you think A LOT about life. But, I always have to remind myself it is really about what is going on right now. Remember, taking one day at a time. What can I do to better my situation and better my life now? What can I do to make sure I continue living my life the best and healthiest way I can? Being cancer free 👊🏻.

I am okay with this! There are many reasons why someone may not be able to have children or want children. It is their own story and something we should not judge them for. I will not be able to carry my own child, but there is another plan for me. It does hurt a little though, I would be lying to you and myself if it didn’t. But, right now in my life it is about me and what I can do to better my situation for the long run.

Personally, I try not to think too far in the future to be completely honest. It is hard…I like to plan. 😬 You get an idea in your head and next minute you have this whole thing planned out, but when will it happen? Storing that idea for later because that idea will happen someday. Right now though, it is honestly about me and getting back to living that life.

In all honesty, it is a touchy subject for anyone. It all depends on how you take it. For me, it’s all about thinking as positive as you can. It is okay and it will be okay. I am human and I sure have my bad days. Days where I really am in a funk and I may take it out on a cheerleader of mine or two or couple. I really don’t mean too. I am battling cancer. But gosh, I need to remember how far I have come.

If you have been going through a hard time in your life, look back on all the good times this year (try to ignore the negative), on the things you have accomplished, the things that have made you happy…those are what we should always remember. Positivity is so key!

If all goes to plan, surgery is all set for January 15th. I am ready to take this risk. I am excited, but scared as HELL. It is surgery, but one that can make a difference in my life. Regardless, this is the right “next step” for me and I feel good about it! My plan is to have my Instagram documenting my journey through recovery and I will blog when I can! 🙂

Thank you all for your support and time with reading my cancer journey! I am excited to see what 2019 will bring. I wish you all a great NYE!

#bebrave

xoxo,

Audrey

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